entering into a new season.

We're entering into a new season over here and my heart is torn up. We have a busy few months of travel looming and as we prepared this summer, Chris and I decided it would be best to start weaning Silas. The Influence conference is in three weeks and that will be the first time I leave him overnight. I get a little bit weepy every time I think about it, though I know it will be good for both of us. I haven't even put much effort into the weaning thing. As he's started walking all over the place and eating three (and a half) meals each day, nursing has fallen to the low end of Si's priority list. I'd say conquering the stairs, eating blueberries, and watching doggies are the top three for him right now. It's as if my baby turned into a toddler overnight and I'm all sorts of bewildered about it.

From the very beginning, Silas and I have been blessed with an incredibly smooth nursing relationship. He had a great latch and ate like a champ from his first day. We had some issues with reflux in the early days, but when he started Zantac at four months, that greatly improved. Not for one second do I take our experience for granted. Just like I was prepared for anything to happen during Si's birth, I was fully prepared to struggle with breast-feeding. And why we were blessed with smooth-sailing, I'll never know. 

So, I'm often overcome with thankfulness that I've had 13 months of nursing this little boy. Countless middle of the night feeding sessions. Many hours of nursing in public and praying I wouldn't flash passersby. 394 days of milk-drunk newborn smiles, mid-feed toe grabbing and eventually giggles that made my heart soar. Any day now we could have our last nursing session together, so with each one (we're down to about one time per day), I try to soak in the tiny moments. The sleepy stares, the hand-holding, and the rare moments when he falls asleep in my arms. He's growing into a real live toddler boy right before my eyes, but when he's in my arms, he's still my tiny baby.

So bring it on, saggy boobs. And thanks for working so hard for us this past year.